Why Massage Therapy is NOT Sex Work: Debunking Old Perverted Patriarchal Ideas

Massage therapy is an ancient practice with roots that stretch back thousands of years. It is a respected and effective method for promoting physical and mental health, reducing stress, and aiding in the body's natural healing processes.

Unfortunately, despite the many benefits and the professional nature & training of this practice, there remains a persistent and troubling misconception: that massage therapy is somehow synonymous with sex work. This outdated and offensive belief is not only harmful to the reputation of skilled therapists but also to the fabric of a profession dedicated to wellness and healing. Though this is a somewhat lingering issue worldwide, there is an exceptionally large problem with it in GOZO and MALTA. And hence this article.

The Perverted Patriarchal Ideas

The notion that massage therapy is equivalent to sex work is rooted in perverted patriarchal ideas that have persisted for far too long. Historically, these ideas have been propagated by a male-dominated society that often reduces women and women's roles to sexual objects. This reductive thinking is evident in the way some men approach massage therapy, treating it not as a therapeutic practice but as an opportunity to fulfill their sexual fantasies.

One of the most glaring examples of this is the inappropriate and disrespectful behavior of some male clients, who assume that female massage therapists are offering "happy endings." And attempt to beg for this service, even after they are told NO, desperately trying to offer more money.

This not only demeans the therapist but also undermines the legitimacy of the entire profession. Genuine female therapists on Gozo and Malta are fed up with this creepy behavior. These women, who have dedicated their lives to helping others through their skills, expertise, knowledge & therapeutic touch, should not have to deal with the ignorance and entitlement of men who view them as mere sexual objects.

The Unintelligent Clone Army

It often feels like these men are part of some unintelligent clone army, lost in time & marching trance-like with outdated, chauvinistic views. By research in a female therapists 'safeguarding group' that was created for women to RED FLAG such men, it appears they all have identical ways of communicating. Some of them come to massage appointments with preconceived notions, misunderstanding the true purpose of the therapy and degrading the profession in the process. This behavior is not only disrespectful but also dangerous. It creates an environment where female therapists feel unsafe and undervalued, constantly on guard against inappropriate advances.

The idea of men humping tables, masturbating over the phone when asking for a treatment, or asking for sexual favors is not only bizarre but highlights a profound misunderstanding of what massage therapy is supposed to achieve. Massage therapy is about healing, relaxation, and physical well-being, not about fulfilling some distorted fantasy. Or getting unmet sexual needs met.

Safety and Respect

Women working as massage therapists or offering body therapies deserve to feel safe and respected in their workplaces. The constant threat of inappropriate behavior from male clients is a serious issue that needs to be addressed. This isn't just about protecting the therapists, but also about educating men to evolve their understanding and respect towards the profession. And towards women.

Imagine a scenario where every time a woman answers the phone to engage with a client, or enters her place of work, she is forced to be on guard over whether she'll have to fend off unwanted advances. This is the reality for many female massage therapists in Malta and Gozo. The fear of being sexualized in a professional setting is not just uncomfortable; it's a real threat to their sense of safety and professional integrity.

The Call for Change

It's high time that men here evolved their attitudes and learned to respect the boundaries and professionalism of this profession. This involves recognizing massage therapy for what it is: a legitimate, therapeutic practice aimed at improving health and well-being. It also means understanding that terms like "massage", "massage therapy" and "healing" are not euphemisms for sexual services.

Whilst we are here talking about massage and body related therapies, let also include Yoga and Tantra, both of which come from a similar tradition. Tantra particularly - has unfortunatly also become synonymous with sex work, and "Tantra massage" a code word for erotic massage, or more accurately - a massage that just includes a handjob.

Tantra for instance, is an ancient spiritual practice that actually encompasses much more than just physical touch, or sexuality, and is much more based on advanced principles of working with energy. It is a deep and profound philosophy of non-duality, emphasizing the interconnectedness of all things, and involves meditative and spiritual exercises. To reduce Tantra to a "handjob" is to grossly misunderstand, disrespect & and trivialize an ancient, sacred practice that has been revered for over 5000 years.

Women, Choose Your Words Wisely

Sad as it is to have to say, given the pervasive misconceptions here, it's important for women to have to choose their words wisely when describing their services. Using certain terms like "massage therapy" or "healing" or "tantric" without clear explanation can unfortunately attract the wrong kind of attention and encourage more of these type of 'clients'. Being explicit about the professional and therapeutic nature of these services can help in setting clear boundaries and expectations.

However, it is equally important that society, especially men, educates themselves to overcome these ingrained biases. Education and awareness are key to dismantling the patriarchal views that reduce real therapeutic practices, & women, to mere sexual services & objects. There is also a real need for men to do some inner healing work, to overcome these centuries old ingrained ideas and conditionings, as Patriarchy has also diminished the true power and value of men in their actual soverignity.

A Request for Respect and Evolution

To all the men with these inclinations out there: it's time to stop acting like bears with no control over their urges. It's time to recognize the value and professionalism of massage therapy. And, the qualities women so uniquely bring, that this world is actually starving for - kindness, care, compassion, gentleness, intuition, empathy and so on. This is not just about respecting women in the profession; it's also about respecting the profession itself. Understand that when you contact a massage therapist, or walk into a massage therapy session, you are entering a space dedicated to healing and well-being, where someone has invested much time, energy and care in learning their skills in order to help you.

Leave your inappropriate expectations at the door.

Moreover, it's crucial for male sexual awareness to evolve from one that includes only animal lust and taking, to one that is consent-based and honors the feminine. The reason these sexually frustrated men are seeking handjobs and "happy endings" is that they lack the skills and maturity to meet or please real women. Instead of harassing massage therapists, these men would benefit far more from learning relational skills, such as communication, empathy, and respect. Developing these abilities would not only improve their relationships, but also help them lead more fulfilling and satisfying lives.

Times are changing, and women no longer have to put up with this centuries-old BS. Men who refuse to evolve their understanding and behavior will be left behind in a society that increasingly values respect, consent, and equality. So, men, please evolve your thinking, and women, continue to stand strong and professional and do SPEAK OUT. Together, we can change the narrative and ensure that massage therapy is recognized for the incredibly healing practice it truly is.

The Journey from outdated partiarcal ideas to one of respect, soverignity, equality & unity

Conclusion

The misconception that massage therapy is equivalent to sex work is a damaging relic of patriarchal thinking. It's time for society, especially men, to evolve beyond these outdated views and recognize massage therapy & body related healing therapies for the legitimate, therapeutic practices that they are.

Genuine female therapists in Gozo and Malta, and indeed around the world, are sick of creepy behavior and deserve to work in environments where they feel safe and respected.

By educating ourselves, speaking out, and challenging these perverted ideas, we can create a more respectful and understanding society. Let's truly honour this beautiful profession, the true purpose of massage therapy and ensure that these ancient practices are treated with the respect they deserve. So, men, please evolve your thinking, and women, continue to stand strong and professional and DO speak out. Things begin to change when we have the courage to know our worth, support one another, speak out and set strong boundaries together, we can change the narrative.

with love

🍃The Body Sanctuary 🍃 The Body Sanctuary offers a range of unique massage therapies, and specialises in deeper Somatic Bodywork and Somatic Coaching Therapies - helping you reconnect to the innate power and wisdom of your body, heal trauma, release repressed emotions, and hear the inner truths your body has to share with you.

NOTE

I operate a ZERO TOLERANCE policy for any sexual behaviour as mentioned in this article, and all new male clients, unless referred by a woman, are booked into a public clinic in victoria, Gozo.

🌹

I offer therapeutic 1:1 sessions in Gozo and ONLINE, for anyone wishing to do deeper inner healing work, on any issues related to this post & more. Link to find out more or book a free 15 minute session.

If you are a female therapist and have been affected by anything mentioned in this article - we have a "Female Therapist Safeguarding Group" on whatsapp, which holds a record of all the men to avoid as clients. You are more than welcome to reach out to be added to this group.